Dipo Adebayo
3 min readJun 20, 2020



"Dipo, women have fish brains"

Those were the words I heard from a friend when I was around 15. At that age, I was clueless on why he labeled women so low.

Fast forward to the present and having interacted with a lot of women, I’m yet to meet a single one with a fish brain. Rather, what I’ve met are smart, incredibly strong, sacrificial and super humans, for whom I have a lot of respect. However,

I now understand why my friend made that statement. He was only echoing the voice of a culture that has long looked down on women and demeaned them. He had become part of a system that felt somehow "better" or "superior" in nature to women, therefore he would likely become an adult who would subjugate, subdue, and perhaps oppress women

Gentlemen, permit me to make two things clear: one, you are in no way better than a woman. You are not smarter or wiser, or some "better" creation of God compared to a woman. Two, that you are the head of your wife, doesn’t make you the head of all women. You have no authority or dominion over women.


Take a moment and just think deeply on that last paragraph. Let it sink deeply into you. Let it shatter the lies society has told you. A woman is not to be subdued, she’s not some wild animal you "tame". Giving her the rightful honor she deserves doesn’t reduce your honor, rather it increases it. To honor her is to honor yourself.

Don’t see her as "less" than yourself, rather, see one equal to you, in mind, spirit and soul. Don’t see one you were made to suppress and subjugate, rather see one you were designed to protect and care for.

Our strength as men, isn’t to oppress and subjugate women, rather it’s to do the exact opposite, to protect and to lift up. Make no mistake about this: one day we all will give account of how we used that strength God gave us, in relation to women.

Gentlemen, live, and let women live. She has every right to say a big NO to your advances, without having to suffer for it. She has a right to her body, the same way you have a right to yours. We are equals.

Enough of the subjugation, enough of the superiority complex. Enough of the demeaning gender "jokes", enough of the shaming, sexual humiliation, harrasment & hostility.


Such cruelty isn't even fit for one less than you, how much more, one equal to you? There is no inequality here. We are both created in God's image.

We. Are. Equals.

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Dipo Adebayo

I am a water engineer, softskills coach, writer & teen counselor. I write on hope and rising above shame, rejection, fear & failure. Follow on IG @dipoadebayo